Little people give me hope

Some people think I’m crazy as I work full time whilst battling with my own brain. But the truth is, I couldn’t live without my job.

I work 40 hours a week Monday to Friday in a nursery as a supervisor. I’ve worked full time since I was 17 years old, it’s just the way I’ve been brought up.

I personally have to work full time to cover my rent, bills and life. There is no way I could cut my hours down and because of my title and responsibility at work, this is also not an option.

So, I manage a team of 8 ladies between the age of 18 and 62.. we look after children between the age of 2- preschool, we can take up to 49 children a day.. it’s hard work. It’s also extremely hard to try and control and manage 8 ladies.. it’s bitchy and can be a little like being back in high school.

The one thing I really struggle with most about working full time is getting up in the morning, especially if I’ve had a bad night. But at the same time, my job gives me purpose and seeing all those lil faces in the morning keeps me going.

Unfortunately, my managers aren’t very supportive of my mental health, they know I suffer from bad anxiety but that is all they know. I will keep it this way as it’s easier than trying to explain something that they would not understand.

Day to day, everything is different. I am a completely different person at work to what I am when I leave work. At work I am confident, I am silly, I am ok. But being all those things at work does have an affect on my life at home, as I hold everything in at work and then let it all out at home.

But, as my title says, little people give me hope.

2 thoughts on “Little people give me hope

  1. Thanks for sharing this! I feel the exact same way about my job, too! I am a full-time nursing assistant on a heart floor at a hospital. While working so much can make me feel like I don’t have enough time for myself and while I would love to focus on my mental health a bit more, I Have to work full time to pay for things. In the same way, I also don’t know where or who I would be without my work. Knowing that I help take care of sick people, have an impact on people’s lives, and am doing something really good makes me feel accomplished and makes me feel like I have purpose. As bad as it sounds, it also makes me feel better about myself in that it is a constant reminder to me that things could be much worse for myself and makes me feel grateful for the health that I do have. It’s like a love-hate situation. I can also act like things are fine and can joke and can take whatever is thrown at me at work with a smile on my face and a “good attitude” and be this different person at work, but it can affect me at home at the end of the day and being overwhelmed at work drains me and can make me take it out on people in my personal life when I am not at work. It’s a tricky situation for sure, but I keep on going because I Do think that it is a big part of what also keeps me going every day.

    Like

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